Last ultrasound at old RE's office!!!

It was great! I was in an absolute panic. The next two weeks are going to be the scariest time for me, I think. I know the last two nights I've been waking up in the middle of the night and getting nervous about the ultrasound but this morning I was feeling okay until we got into the ultrasound room. Then my blood pressure went a little high and I started freaking out. When the nurse came in, I had to tell her that I was shaking b/c I was so scared of the ultrasound machine! But she agreed that when you've seen a heartbeat one week and the following week, you walk into the room thinking you will see it again, and there is no heartbeat, it is scarring. She said I will probably always feel that way about ultrasounds. But, on to the good news...and more pics. The nurse (who was different this week and was very nice) said that we'd get right to it so that we can put me more at ease...well, in goes the wand, and immediately, there is our sweet little baby...and it's heartbeat! We poked around looking at its head and little arm and leg buds...which were moving! Then we got to hear the heartbeat and measure it, which was at a nice, strong 167 bpm! So, everything went well. I went from shaking in fear to crying with relief. I've literally spent the last few weeks pretending that I am not pregnant so that I can get through this trimester...and today, for the first time, I actually felt some hope and relief. So, here are some pictures:
This one is a little blurry, but we were actually able to see the little head and little arm and leg buds in this image while it was on the screen.

Here is the heartbeat one. It is further away but shows the cute little body in the sac and the beautiful hb!

That was my last u/s at the local RE's office! I'm sure I will have at least one more blood test there as CCRM tries to wean me off of the estrogen and progesterone, but I have my first appointment at the OB's office on Monday! This is great news...but is also scary. This is the exact appointment that I found out the bad news last time I was pregnant- our first appointment at the OB's office. Last time it was slighly later - about 9 weeks and 3 days when this time we will be there at 9 weeks 1 day, but it is still a very anxious time for me. Luckily, we changed OB's offices since the other one had some odd practices and both Brett and I were uncomfortable with how they handled things. So, a fresh start! Hopefully a totally different result!

On another note, this week marks my estimated due date for that pregnancy. The due date was July 9th. I've never really been one to dwell on this and make much of it, but this time feels different...we had already gotten far enough to really feel this was a viable pregnancy...and I had already pictured myself huge and hot in the July weather...so I am very thankful that I am pregnant again and have some hope as this week comes and goes, but I am sad to think of what could have been and the baby that was almost ours.

Weaning and the beauty of B6

I am starting to wean off the meds! yay! My progesterone had been staying steady at 29 or 28.5 but then on Monday went to 26....today it was 38.1!!! That is great! They like to see it at over 20 when you are on the PIO, and it has never been over 30 this cycle, so I am guessing that maybe, just maybe, the placenta and my body have taken over some of the progesterone production! that is the greatest news yet. Add to that the fact that for weeks now I've been dreading next Sunday...when Brett is away at his sister's wedding in Mexico and my local RE's office is closed and I have to figure out how to give myself this big ass shot all by my lonesome (yes, I know some women do it, but I'm a big baby about it). Now that I am cutting down to a shot every other day, I had the nurse make sure that it means I will skip next Sunday!!! Yay!!!! I also have been slowly watching my E2 climb for the last few weeks. It was at 520 a few weeks ago and then 592 last Monday and 796 this Monday...so they told me to reduce to 3 vivelle patches and today I was at 772. It seems that it is also climbing steadily...so I cut down to 2 patches on Saturday! yay (I hate peeling those patches off...they always take skin with them).

Besides that, I found out from my mom that my sister in law (brother's wife) went to see the doctor and got her official due date...you won't believe this...it is February 20! Mine is Feb 14th!!!! And, given that this is my first, I am likely to deliver late...and since it is her third now, she is likely to deliver early...isn't it cute? we'll give birth on the same day. Boo hiss. I haven't really spoken to them yet about the pregnancy but my understanding is that they were going to give me the news on my birthday (your birthday gift is the news of a new neice or nephew) but I didn't let my brother get to the point on my birthday and I haven't talked to him since. Probably bitchy of me...but oh well. I know it is in good intentions - this particular SIL and I have always had problems (read earlier post...or I could tell more stories) and I believe she wants to be pregnant at the same time as me so we can become more like sisters and she can share her infinite wisdom with me....and my brother just thinks it would be fun to have cousins of the same age. So, I can't be too mean about it. I am happy for them...just annoyed. And, I'm a little afraid of her trying to be too sisterly with me during this pregnancy - it will probably make us even more distant.

One more fun tidbit. After feeling sick for weeks now and getting progressively worse and worse with morning sickness, I went back to the "congratulations you are pregnant!" form that I received from the RE since I thought it said something about morning sickness. It recommended that I try 25mg of B6 3x a day. I did some research and though I know too much B6 is bad for you, this is a relatively small dose...so I went ahead and took one Tuesday night. Then I took 3 yesterday...and one this morning...and I feel sooooooo much better. I mean, I still get nausea here and there, but I'm not overwhelmingly sick and throwing up or dry heaving or laying on our chair-and-a-half and wanting to die, so that is an improvement! My nurse said that if I start to feel much better, I can cut down to 2 a day and stay on that (lowest dosage that works is best). So, I'm a happy camper. I actually ate lunch and almost enjoyed it!

So, my next ultrasound is Monday and I'll post more pics. As you heard above, I have decided, unfortunately, to miss my (good) sister in law's wedding in Mexico, which I am very sad about, but I just can't bring myself to do anything that could be risky and my RE disagrees with travel during the first trimester. Particularly to countries that don't have the best healthcare. Oh well, for now, have a great Fourth of July weekend!