Adjusting and getting excited

So, I am adjusting to the idea of twins. I always knew there was a pretty good chance it could happen and, to be honest, some of you might recall me crying because the embryo we transferred with Teagan didn't make it. Its not that I actually always wanted twins, its just that we transferred 2 healthy embryos and deep down, I wanted them both to make it. This transfer, I kind of felt the same way but I was pretty sure only one would make it...and, I loved being pregnant with one and not worrying too much about preterm labor, or exercising, or weight gain, or likely NICU time or how to breastfeed 2 babies....So, those were really my concerns. I've seen women do amazing carrying twins and I've seen women on bedrest forever and a close friend gave birth to twins at 28.5 weeks. However, I've done my research and I am more comfortable that I can hold them until they are ready and I can take it really easy so that they are safe and protected and grow. I've since learned that I have to gain at least 40 pounds, most of which I should start putting on soon. I have to cut down a lot of my exercise, which is fine, I'd do anything for them. I also have a better chance of carrying them past 35 weeks simply because I've been pregnant before. And, I keep thinking, Teagan stayed in to almost 42 weeks, so would that maybe indicate I might be okay at it???? Besides that, I know I can breastfeed two. Despite not being very well-endowed in that department, I made more than enough milk for Teagan so, as long as I can get a system down, it is doable. Now, I just have to make sure my doctor is a good doctor for twins, otherwise I'll have to change offices. We have to buy a minivan! We have to refinish the basement and clear up the room we are using as our office to make a new bedroom! Lots of stuff...and I am all over the place..but you see how I've been thinking. About Teagan, you are all right. If I am this worried about it now, Brett and I are going to go out of our way to make her feel special and she will just hopefully learn to enjoy being a big sister to 2 little ones. Right now, she is just so loving towards babies that I am feeling hopeful. She loves to kiss babies all of a sudden - pictures of babies, her little cousin, the baby doll that we had to get the dogs ready for a baby in the house. You name it, its a baby, she kisses it and snuggles it. I actually caught her pulling up the baby doll's shirt and kissing her belly! (okay, so she was mimicking mom, but it was so cute I wanted to cry!). I am 8 weeks now and have a sonogram with my old OB on Wednesday. If I think he will do a good job with twins, I'll stay, if not, I am looking for a new one. As some of you recall, I don't have great loyalty to this OB specifically, since he didn't even make it to Teagan's birth (and I was induced), so I am on the fence about him already. I've been reading the Barbara Luke twins book and taking her advice so we'll see how that goes. I also started cutting down on the PIO this week and the vivelle patches, so hopefully that trend will continue come Thursday's blood test. In the meantime, I am extremely nauseous, have a pretty bad cold and am completely exhausted. But, I am getting excited:-) Ugh, and yes this post was a mess but I have to run and wanted to get it up...however, I did format it and have no idea why it lumped together like that in some weird chain-of-thought paragraph! But, I suppose it is fitting...